Friday, September 22, 2006

it's 1984 man, orwell is here and now

So this week, as a result of the Summit at the UN here in NYC, the city is on a virtual lockdown. I literally cannot walk 50 feet down my block without running into a police officer. There's 10 on every corner, and 5 more on break in the diner. It's a major show of force. And it creeps me out.
Some of you may say, 'Hey, what's wrong with that? We've been clambering for 5 years for increased security. This police presence should reassure you that our government is doing everything it can to keep us safe.'

Well, it doesn't. And here is why. Nothing happened. Good, right? Maybe. But I question what these policies mean in the grander scheme. When is the last time that we weren't on a heightened alert level? What happens when we keep rolling out this massive show of force that never meets the confrontation it is there to stop? How long before we as residents begin to adapt to the continual police presence? How long before this force is turned inward? With no tangible threats to protect the public from, how far of a step is it from protection to repression?

They've got us up against the wall. And I just wonder how long until it becomes overt. How long until law abiding American dissidents begin to hear it. "Up against the wall, motherfucker!"

jesus camp review

Here is a review I did for Blank Screen Media of the film Jesus Camp, opening today:

Jesus Camp Review

Monday, September 18, 2006

i'm not racist, i never say the 'n' word

You are racist. It's been proven. A recent study showed that infants responded more favorably to people of similar ethnic backgrounds. That is, to people who had similar features and spoke their natural language. If you think about our tribal past as human beings, this makes sense. In a setting in which there existed competing tribes of people, it would be beneficial to identify with your own tribe, as a survival instinct. If you were to instinctively identify with members of other tribes as your own, than you would be likely to find yourself in compromising situations.

We need to first recognize this impulse, rather than deny it. We need to recognize that we instinctively view people as different and as intelligent, modern beings, and we need to understand that it is no longer a valid impulse. It no longer serves the greater interest and in order to evolve we need to make a conscious decision to act, and to make ourselves think, in defiance of it.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006


Here's a review I did of HORSE the Band's Pizza EP at Diminished Seven Magazine:

Pizza Review

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

dollar dollar bills y'all

I for one am absolutely appalled at the tactless 9/11 fifth anniversary coverage every network and cable news station (with the partial exception of CNN) paraded out yesterday. ABC produced a made for TV movie sensationalizing the event. Disgusting. Our greatest national tragedy gets the same respect as the Nancy Kerrigan story. Coverage I stumbled upon on A&E and other cable stations was just as bad, recreating victim's mornings with all the detached insincerity of an episode of Unsolved Mysteries. I didn't even watch Fox News' coverage. But I have no problem trashing it with absolutely no knowledge of what it was about. I'm sure it was a joke. The coverage I saw on CNN was the only coverage that did not make me throw up in my mouth. At least they had a sense of perspective on the matter and traced the origins of Osama Bin Laden's (remember him?) involvement.

Then I had to look at President Bush's jackass mug on every network station, explaining that we're safe, but not safe. Again, we're safe, but not safe. And once again trying to connect the war in Iraq with increased security at home. Bullshit.

In the end, I think the only telecast to do justice to the tragedy was Monday Night Football, offering a respectful moment of silence in remembrance of all those who lost their lives. That is all that is needed. Respect and remembrance.

Network news, seriously, go kill yourself.

Monday, September 11, 2006

he's going to have a heart attack, plus he's fat

Stop eating. (Except you nicole richie, you go right ahead.) According to the American Obesity Association, 64.5 percent of U.S. adults, age 20 years and older, are overweight and 30.5 percent are obese. That means that nearly one third of the adult population in this country is so fat that it has become "a risk factor for certain health conditions or increased mortality." We as Americans have such an unbelievably fat culture. It's disgusting. And fast food and snack companies are promoting foods that encourage this trend.

Every day they make it easier to eat more, faster. And that's what we as American consumers want. More. Faster. There's no artistry when it comes to American food consumption. We don't revel in dinner parties or cook up three course meals for our families. We shovel paper wrapped saturated fat down our gullets from the convenience of our vehicles. God forbid we walk inside a restaurant, sit down, and eat an actual meal. Although, at the rate we're going, if we all suddenly decided to eschew the McDonald's drive-thru and go inside, we might not all fit.

Seriously, though. Expend a little effort. Learn to cook, you might actually find it fun and enjoyable. Get something at the local sandwich shop instead of Burger King or Taco Bell. So what if they don't have a drive-thru, you'll survive the trecherous 5 yard hike through the parking lot. Think about what you're putting in your body. I may sound ridiculous ordering a half-caf, nonfat, soy latte with sugar free syrup - but at least im not fat.

Friday, September 08, 2006

we're watching you

As a nation, we recoil whenever its time to face the 9/11 boogeyman in the closet. It was a tragic event for this country. But get over it and stop letting those who wish to oppress you make you live your lives in fear. And I'm not talking about this absurd abstraction of the "axis of evil", or "islamo-fascists", or the "evil devils, they're all gonna kill you, oh my god, oh my god" or whatever the fuck the Bush administration is calling them these days. I'm talking about our own government, the power structure in our own country. They've recast what it means to be an American. The values of liberty and dissent have been replaced by loyalty and obedience, and they have created a culture of fear in order to instill these values and beat down opposition. Dictators rule through fear. Through violence and intimidation. But our own dictators are more clever than that. They purport to be our protectors. The Great Protector. The Great Benefactor. They hide behind the spector of a terrorist attack thats never going to come, an attack that if it does come they won't be able to stop anyways (remember, they're 0-1 on that count, no matter what they say), and they use it as a pretext to systematically strip us of our freedoms. To keep us cowering in our homes.

Every day this country marches along towards becoming a police state. Secretly detaining "illegal combatants", holding them for years without charging them with a crime. Torturing detainees. The education department is turning over financial aid records to the FBI. The White House is trying to slip through bills that allow for violations of the Geneva Convention and that gives retroactive immunity, dating back to september 11, 2001, to CIA agents that used illegal techniques in interrogations. And we all march in line, resigned to our fate. A few voices are raised now and again, but its not enough. And they aren't saying anything. Mostly its idealists from the 60s era who can't give up the ghost. Potesting out of a sense of nostalgia. And our generation is just apathetic. Sure, we turn out for P. Diddy's vote or die campaign. We watch that faux liberal wanna-be-indie fuck Gideon Iago report on the Iraq War. But in reality we dont do shit. And we dont give a shit. Because we're comfortable.

Everyone needs to wake the fuck up. You can always just wake up...

anything to numb/
anything to encourage ignorance/
anything to numb/
anything to put us to sleep

Thursday, September 07, 2006

ooooh, you're middle aged, aren't you fucking special

ok, i happen to be 22. an excellent age if i do say so myself. old enough to drink at a restaurant without any clever, "you just made it!" comments from the waitress upon seeing 21 on my id. but not so old as to be 23.

except i have to deal with middle aged douchebags on a regular basis who think they are better than me due to the mere fact that they have been around longer. whoop-de-fucking doo, you're 45! that's quite the accompishment! how did you ever manage to get a whole year older every single year. without ever missing a year. that's commitment. that's excellence.

but wait! after careful study of the theories of space and time, i have determined that, barring a terrible stingray swimming accident (sorry, cheap shot. i loved steve irwin. r.i.p.) or tragic motorcycle accident that would cause me to die young and leave a pretty corpse, i will, without expending any effort, one day reach the promised land of middle age.

so here's an idea, stop acting like you're smarter than me because you have a few dozen years on me. you're not. i admit, perhaps i'm not smarter than everyone. but there's a 100% chance i'm smarter than you. so, you're older than me. so, you're full of useless information that you've accrued by being stuck in the same job for 20 years. so what. that just means you've had more time to use up all your good ideas. and more time to contemplate an early exit from your pathetic existance. so, leave me alone and go fantasize about fucking your secretary. who's probably fantasizing about fucking the cute 22 year-old kid writing on his blog down the hall.

first post, omg i'm so excited!

its a widely known fact, that i just made up, that 99.9% of all internet traffic is directly related to porn searches, or from people mistakenly clicking on links that they thought would lead them to porn. in an attempt to capitalize on this i've created this blog and cleverly inserted porn into the title. i'm a marketing genius. soon my wit will be entertaining millions of would be masterbators. sweet.